The people of India have given their verdict, “Budiya” Congress and their Ulta Pulta Alliance (UPA) have the mandate to “govern” (screw) our Country for another 5 loooooong years. And they have sufficient strength to do so (pun intended), as if the last five years were not enough. Ours is a truly hungry and needy Nation. But that is not the worst thing that could have happened. The nightmare of every discerning, well meaning Indians especially that of the greedy corporate houses and blood sucking stock brokers was the delusion of “Third Front” ( also known as power addicts rehabilitation center) of the pigheaded but secular but godless communists.
This affords us to take a look (dig) at the big losers:
1. Loh Purush – Advani
Fondly called as the second sardar vallabhai patel (the great man is turning in his grave right now) by his followers, Advani lived upto his name “PM in waiting”. His party happily assisted by projecting the third sardar vallabhai patel ( the great man just died again for the second time) aka Indian Nero just at the right time. Back to the familiar post of warming the opposition benches like he did for decades, Only this time as the weakest opposition leader with no future. Except watching movies of course.
2. Lady Ozymandias - Mayawati
Her narcissistic fetishes for “bronze statues” and “dholpur” pink stone is well know. After fighting assembly elections on the issue of goonda raj she did a volte face and became their doting “Raakhi Bhen”. Well not forgetting her love of throwing lavish birthday parties so big it could end up taking people’s lives out of sheer extravagance. Contesting all the 543 seats of Lok Sabha, she was already planning for her masterpiece statue to be installed in the PMO. Now she is on frenzied sacking spree. Only her sculptors in UP are safe now!!
3. Indian Nero – Narendra Modi
No incumbent Chief Minister has ever (hopefully will never again) received such glowing tributes from the Apex Court of our Country for his human rights record. After smartly changing his tune to a different song called developement, he plunged into the national elections arena. He took the elections debates to different plane altogether with his budiya-gudiya statements and even disturbed the deep slumber of the sleeping beauty “Deve Gowda”, when he famously asked who is the father and mother of Third Front? so much for his oratory skills. When some anarchic voices within his party projected him as “PM in Waiting”, he began to salivate at the prospects of a bigger playground to continue his hate experiments. Smiling he left for Delhi before the counting began. Alas! voters flattered to deceive. Before he knew what hit him, he slipped away without a whimper back to his fiefdom with tail firmly between his legs.
4. Big Brother- Prakash Karat
If he had known that US will be converting to Socialism from Capitalism, Comrade Karat would not have vehemently opposed the “nuclear deal” as if it was a “big deal”. Right… No wrong! According to Karat, any body who hurts his ego is an imperialist, blood sucking Capitalist. Business men are Comrades and farmers are imperialists. Denying car manufacturing company fertile land is oppression of the proletariat. If Karl Marx was dreaming of perfect socialistic society was utopian, the non congress, non bjp government was nothing but a delusion!!
5. Sugarcane warlord -Sharad Pawar
If Ricky Ponting shoving him off the presentation stage was not enough, the voters have now shoved his PM aspirations, for the time being atleast. His flirtations with third front and the bjd gave birth to a new innovation in campaigning for elections. “Addressing rallies through Cell Phone” Now one wonders if he was in the wrong ministry all this time!!!
6. Amma - Jayalalitha
Amma had never got so many feelers since her celluloid days. Rising Gold prices, recession coupled with being out of power made her fall out of love with diamond jewelry and saris. This vacuum was filled by LTTE. Expected to sweep the elections and making her a sure shot king maker, vijaykant proved to be a party spoiler. Feelers have dried up quickly.
They may be losers. However, there is but one Golden Rule in politics. “Never make the mistake of writing off any one. Never”. But that is for the dirty politicians. For us the golden rule is “There will be losers always. Always.” Come another five years, who knows may be even less, election will be held again, there will be losers this time it might be the turn of Italian czarinas, bespectacled darlings and Pappu PM. We shall be waiting. We shall be watching……
